6 Game Plans to Increase Wellbeing Through Relationships 👥

6 Game Plans to Increase Wellbeing Through Relationships 👥

Relationships and social connections are a cornerstone of flourishing in life.

Meaningful engagement with others is an important source of wellbeing, helping us to weather all we encounter in the fullness of our experiences – from joys to sorrows, love to hate, meaning to meaninglessness, engagement to disengagement – and all the ambiguities of our lives. During life’s challenges, relationships can be the tether that helps us stay connected.

The remarkable 85-year Harvard Study of Adult Development clarifies the great value of relationships as an important component of a happy life (Waldinger, 2015). According to Robert Waldinger, MD, longitudinal evidence shows that people who build connections and relationships fare much better in life. For example, in retirement it’s the relationships with others that many people miss most when they leave their jobs (Schulz & Waldinger, 2023).

In his 2015 TED talk, Waldinger explains:

“The clearest message that we get from this [85] year study is this:
Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.”

If you’ve not viewed Waldinger’s TED talk, it’s worth seeing.

Life satisfaction is built on many pillars. Positive psychologists use the acronym PERMA to note five measurable building blocks of wellbeing, which include: Positive emotions, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning and Mattering, and Accomplishment (Kellerman & Seligman, 2023; Seligman, 2011). Crucial among these elements is the R – relationships.

Even brief casual social interactions can boost wellbeing (Fredrickson, 2013. Researchers, Epley and Schroeder 2014), studied the experience of interacting with strangers. They conducted nine experiments in the laboratory and out in the real world, including asking commuters traveling on buses and trains to connect with strangers and start up a conversation. What they found was contrary to what we might have expected. People riding on a train to downtown Chicago and on a public bus reported more positive experiences when they talked to a stranger than when they sat alone in solitude. Other experiments have shown similar findings (Mallett, Wilson & Gilbert, 2008).

Here’s the bottom line. For many of us, striking up a conversation can be beneficial for our wellbeing, while loneliness and social isolation can be difficult and painful (Holt-Lundstad, 2017). Accumulating research suggests that we could improve our own wellbeing (at least in the moment) and also benefit others with even simple casual social interactions.

We humans are inherently social beings, and these findings offer important information to consider about the many benefits of social connection. Yet many of us tend to avoid or dismiss brief casual interactions, not realizing their potential positives for the people involved.

Would you like to increase your engagement in social interaction with others in positive, prosocial ways? Here are 6 strategies:

1. Greeting people and engaging in brief, friendly conversations with neighbors, shop staff, library visitors, gym members, or passersby in safe public places.
2. Talking with colleagues at work or interacting positively with customers in your professional environment.
3. Sharing expressions of gratitude with someone who has done something kind or helpful.
4. Attending events at community organizations, public centers, informal groups, or social gatherings.
5. Joining a discussion group or a book club to connect through shared interests.
6. Volunteering in meaningful ways, such as helping family or friends, assisting at shelters or organizations, running errands, driving someone to appointments, or bringing food to those who would appreciate it.

There are many ways we can engage in casual social interactions or develop more sustained relationships. What about you?

Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only. No content is a substitute for consulting with a qualified mental health or healthcare professional.

© 2025 Ilene Berns-Zare, LLC, All Rights Reserved

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References:

• • Epley, N., & Schroeder, J. (2014). Mistakenly seeking solitude. Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, 143(5), 1980.
  • Fredrickson, B.L. (2013).  Love 2.0: How our supreme emotion affects everything we feel, think, do, and become. New York, NY: Hudson Street Press.
  • Holt-Lunstad, J. (2017). The potential public health relevance of social isolation and loneliness: Prevalence, epidemiology, and risk factors.  Public Policy & Aging Report 27(4), 127-130. https://academic.oup.com/ppar/article/27/4/127/4782506
  • Kellerman, G. R., & Seligman, M. E. (2023). Tomorrowmind: Thriving at Work with Resilience, Creativity, and Connection—Now and in an Uncertain Future. New York, NY: Simon and Schuster.
  • Mallett, R. K., Wilson, T. D., & Gilbert, D. T. (2008). Expect the unexpected: Failure to anticipate similarities leads to an intergroup forecasting error. Journal of Personality and Social psychology, 94(2), 265
  • Seligman, M. (2011). Flourish. New York, NY: Free Press.
  • Waldinger, R. (November, 2015). What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness. TED-X.           https://www.ted.com/talks/robert_waldinger_what_makes_a_good_life_lessons_from_the_longest_study_on_happiness?language=en

  
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