A New Take on Intergenerational Connections and How They Can Benefit All of Us
Welcome to this month’s Flourish!
Intergenerational relationships connecting younger and older can benefit all of us. In this rapidly changing world, loneliness is a major public health concern for people across age groups.
Why does loneliness matter? According to experts, loneliness can impact wellbeing and is associated with a range of adverse risks including anxiety, depression, heart disease, dementia, and premature death (Jackson & Cleary, 2026; World Health Organization, 2023; Murthy, Office of Surgeon General, 2023).
People throughout the lifespan are at risk of experiencing loneliness (Jackson & Cleary, 2026; Murthy, 2023). Thus, with changing demographics, shifting family and community structures, social-political upheaval, and financial challenges, intentionally strengthening our intergenerational interactions can offer benefits across varied age groups.
To be clear, social isolation and loneliness are not the same thing. Loneliness involves a personal perception that the connections we desire are not satisfied by the quality or quantity of our relationships. While one person may feel satisfied with a few relationships, another may feel a gap between their relational needs and their actual connections.
Intergenerational relationships can help bridge the gap, offering many potential positives for young and old. Interactions across different generations can enrich the lives of everyone involved. For example, sharing wisdom, learning, and stories between older and younger people, and offering skills to strengthen social and emotional wellbeing (Berns-Zare, 2025).
The World Health Organization (2023, p. vii) says intergenerational practice can:
- “Ensure purposeful, mutually beneficial opportunities,
- promote greater generational consciousness and learning, understanding and respect and solidarity among people
- and contribute to building more cohesive communities.”
With more people in the United States over 60 than under 18 years old, the older population is a valuable and largely untapped resource. And elders are not simply living longer but are generally healthier than earlier generations.
Research reveals the benefits of younger and older folks teaming up in meaningful, purposeful relationships (Newberry, 2023; Stanford Center on Longevity, 2016). A long-term Harvard study shows that adults involved in meaningful intergenerational relationships tend to feel more optimistic, less stressed, and happier (Waldinger, 2022). And many older adults are benevolently motivated to share and give back to others. The director of the Harvard Longevity study, Robert Waldinger, MD, invites us to strengthen our social fitness, intentionally engaging in and tending to our interactions with others (2022).
How might you make a positive interactional difference with someone in your life or community?
A big thank you to my publisher, MSI Press, and NABE for this recognition, and to every reader who has supported this book. If you haven’t grabbed a copy yet, please take a look: https://ibzcoaching.com/book/
References:
- Berns-Zare, I. (2025). You’re not too old and it’s not too late: Weekly practices for meaning, mindfulness and new possibilities at midlife and beyond. Hollister, CA: MSI Press. https://www.amazon.com/Youre-Not-Too-Late-Possibilities/dp/195735495X
- Jackson, D., & Cleary, M. (2026). Confronting loneliness: The promise of intergenerational relationships. Issues in Mental Health Nursing, 47(2), 218-221.
- Murthy, V.H. (2023) Our epidemic of loneliness and isolation: The U.S. Surgeon General’s advisory on the healing effects of social connection and community. https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-social-connection-advisory.pdf
- Newberry, L. (2023). What we’re missing out on when we don’t have intergenerational relationships, personally and professionally. https://www.latimes.com/california/newsletter/2023-04-11/what-were-missing-out-on-when-we-dont-have-intergenerational-relationships-personally-and-collectively-group-therapy
- Stanford Center on Longevity. (2016). Hidden In plain sight: How intergenerational relationships can transform our future. chrome extension://efaidnbmnnnibpcajpcglclefindmkaj/https://longevity.stanford.edu/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/Monograph_web_07_11_2016.pdf
- Waldinger, R. (2022). The secret to a happy life — Lessons from 8 decades of research. https://www.ted.com/speakers/robert_waldinger
- Waldinger R.J. (2015) What makes a good life: Lessons from the longest study on happiness. https://www.ted.com/talks/robert_waldinger_what_makes_a_good_life_lessons_from_the_longest_study_on_happiness
- World Health Organization (WHO). 2023. Connecting generations: Planning and implementing interventions for intergenerational contact. https://www.who.int/publications/i/item/9789240070264 For more information on practices to strengthen resilience and flourishing, please see my book:
https://ibzcoaching.com/book/
For more information on practices to strengthen resilience and flourishing, please see my book:
https://ibzcoaching.com/book/
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News & Media
- Creative Ideas for Better Living: Ilene Berns-Zare, PsyD, PCC is interviewed byBeth Buffington The topic is it’s not too late to get creative again. In this episode, Ilene joins Beth to unpack ideas for resilience, creativity, and thriving at midlife and beyond. She shares strategies from her book, You’re Not Too Old and It’s Not Too Late! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rn3QI8d6TBk
- The Power of Resilience: Ilene Berns-Zare, PsyD, PCC, is interviewed by Michelle Millis Chappel. In this episode, Ilene talks about her journey from pharmaceutical sales to her calling to be a psychologist. We also cover strategies from her book, You’re Not Too Old and It’s Not Too Late. Listen to the podcast here!
- Becoming Your Best Version Podcast: Ilene Berns-Zare, PsyD, PCC, is interviewed by Maria Leonard Olsen. In this episode, Ilene discusses topics such as: Strengthening Resilience and Wellbeing in These Challenging Times, Invigorating Your Second Half of Life with Greater Resilience, Flourishing & Possibilities, and Choosing to Live Your Daily Life with Greater Joy, Meaning, & Wellbeing. Listen to the podcast here!
- MarketWatch: Ilene was a featured expert for the article: As We Age, Do We Get Happier or Sadder.“Maybe you’re filled with mixed emotions [about aging]. Yes, there are highs and lows, So ask yourself, ‘How do I want to focus my attention in this moment?” “Identify three things that you’re grateful for each day, Berns-Zare says. From a budding flower to a warm bagel, consciously acknowledge what’s good and celebrate it.” Read more here!
- A Quest for Well-Being:How to Flourish During Challenging Times. Ilene was featured in a podcast interview exploring concepts and strategies to navigate the new normal of a post pandemic world with greater resilience and wellbeing. View the podcast here!
- AARP: The New (Buzzy) Benefits of Exercise.Ilene was a featured expert for the AARP article “The New (Buzz) Benefits of Exercise. “… having purpose is essential for finding that combination of physical, mental and emotional well-being that allows you to live your best life, a state that some call “flourishing.” “It’s very important to have a sense of purpose; it’s one of the pillars for flourishing,” she says. “It’s been shown to enhance your quality of life and your happiness.” Read more here!
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